


out of hand

by joshllyman



Series: sportsfest 2020 fills [20]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Awkward boys are awkward, Future Fic, Haikyuu!! Manga Spoilers, M/M, Mentioned Akaashi Keiji, Mentioned Bokuto Koutarou, Mentioned Hinata Shouyou, Mutual Pining, half a misplaced accusation of homophobia, please forgive me for the title of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:02:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24991996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joshllyman/pseuds/joshllyman
Summary: Objectively speaking, Kageyama has nice hands. Not that Kindaichi’s been looking or anything.They’re good for volleyball, obviously, or Karasuno wouldn’t have made it to Nationals three years in a row while he was there, beating out Seijoh in the regional finals in Kindaichi’s third year (they’d come so close, finally beating Shiratorizawa, only to have Kageyama steal it all out from under them). And now he’s a professional. He even went to the Olympics in Rio, so clearly he’s a talented guy.
Relationships: Kageyama Tobio/Kindaichi Yuutarou
Series: sportsfest 2020 fills [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1789072
Comments: 13
Kudos: 98





	out of hand

**Author's Note:**

> prompt fill: [ sportsfest 2020 ](https://sportsfest.dreamwidth.org/28104.html?thread=3221960#cmt3221960)

_ The heart is the toughest part of the body. Tenderness is in the hands _ . — Carolyn Forché

\---

Objectively speaking, Kageyama has nice hands. Not that Kindaichi’s been looking or anything.

They’re good for volleyball, obviously, or Karasuno wouldn’t have made it to Nationals three years in a row while he was there, beating out Seijoh in the regional finals in Kindaichi’s third year (they’d come so close,  _ finally _ beating Shiratorizawa, only to have Kageyama steal it all out from under them). And now he’s a professional. He even went to the Olympics in Rio, so clearly he’s a talented guy. 

Kindaichi isn’t quite sure when they became friends again. They bumped into each other in town sometime in their second year, and where their messages had long sat dormant on his phone, suddenly he was getting video game questions and homework complaints and invitations to go out to see a movie. Sometimes Hinata or Kunimi tagged along, but most often it was just the two of them, getting to know each other again. 

If Kindaichi had snuck a glance at his hands once or twice over the years...that’s a normal friend thing to do, right?

He feels like he’s been more fixated on them recently. Not just the hands, obviously, but all of Kageyama. Kunimi has caught him daydreaming more than once, and Kindaichi has found it more and more difficult to find an excuse, an alternative to feed his friend instead of telling him the truth. 

Kageyama’s hands are huge. His fingers are long and slender, and in another life he could have been a pianist, maybe, or one of those guys who plays the guitar in a really fancy way. He knows Kageyama keeps good care of his nails or his sister would have his head. Kindaichi frequently gives himself over to fantasies in which he examines Kageyama’s hand. Would he find callouses there? They’re probably tough, given how much he works out. Does he lift weights? He has to lift at least a little bit.

He’s interrupted by a sharp poke to his forehead. Kunimi is smirking at him.

“You ready to tell me yet, or are you gonna lie again?”

Kindaichi sighs. “You’re gonna laugh at me.”

“I mean, maybe. But then you’ll get over it and feel better for having told me.”

He’s probably right. Kindaichi gazes up at the ceiling.

“Hypothetically speaking, would it be weird if I had a crush on a friend of ours?”

Kunimi aims a kick at him. “You’re gonna have to be a lot more specific.”

“He’s an old friend.”

“We have a lot of those.”

“We spend a fair amount of time together.”

“That narrows it down some. Are you gonna tell me, Yuutarou, or are you gonna make me play twenty questions?”

Kindaichi looks down at his hands. “It’s Kageyama.”

For a moment, Kunimi is silent. Kindaichi risks a look upward at him and sees he’s grinning.

“I should have known,” he says, laughter already bubbling up.

Kindaichi rolls his eyes. “Shut up, asshole.”

“You gonna do anything about it?”

“No,” Kindaichi huffs. “Obviously not. He’s Kageyama, fuck.”

Kunimi kicks him again. “So? You’re Yuutarou. You guys have been through a ton together. Honestly I’m a little mad at myself for not calling it. I say go for it.”

Kindaichi frowns. “You really think so?”

“I’m not gonna stroke your ego twice,” Kunimi says. He flops down on the couch beside Kindaichi. “You’ve reached your daily limit, try again tomorrow.”

Kindaichi grins. “Alright. I’ll think about it.”

“Do that. In the meantime, pass me the remote so I can kick your ass in  _ Smash Bros. _ ”

\---

Kindaichi catches himself thinking about it again that weekend. He’s supposed to be listening to Kageyama tell a story about the last time he’d seen Hinata and Bokuto, but instead he’s drifting off, watching Kageyama’s hands. He’s not the sort of person who gesticulates a lot, but each hand motion is carefully chosen to add emphasis to what he’s saying. He’s holding a cup of coffee in one hand. 

Kindaichi wants to hold his other hand. Like, a distracting amount.

“Are you alright?” Kageyama asks, his voice cutting into Kindaichi’s reverie.

“Sorry, what?” 

Kageyama rolls his eyes. “You weren’t listening at all, were you?”

“Uh, something about Hinata riding on Bokuto’s shoulders,” Kindaichi says. His face reddens.

Kageyama smiles softly. Kindaichi is reminded, rather abruptly, of the first time he’d ever seen Kageyama wearing a genuine smile. He’d never smiled in middle school. It wasn’t until high school, after a particularly bad movie that they’d walked out on. They’d stopped for ice cream and as Kindaichi was making fun of the terrible special effects, he caught Kageyama smiling. He’d stopped dead in the middle of his sentence and couldn’t recall what he was saying when Kageyama had prompted him.

Huh. Maybe he’s been nursing this crush longer than he thought.

“Yuutarou?” Kageyama says quietly. The smile is gone from his face, and Kindaichi realizes he’s probably missed something. Again. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

This is getting...out of hand.

“Shit,” Kindaichi sighs. “Look, can I tell you something super weird? It’ll explain why I’m so off lately and hopefully we can just forget it and move on and I’ll go back to normal.”

Kageyama blinks. “Go ahead,” he instructs slowly. His face is guarded, and it puts Kindaichi on edge.

He takes a deep breath. One fell swoop, and they can both get on with their lives. 

“I think I might...like you, or something,” Kindaichi begins. He fixes his gaze on the table. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot when you’re not around—not in like, a weird way—fuck—just like, when we’re not together I wish we were and it would be cool if I could hold your hand or something.”

Kageyama is silent. Kindaichi winces.

“That’s it. Uh, sorry. If you wanna do that thing where we don’t talk for two weeks and then we forget the whole thing happened that’s fine.”

Kageyama still doesn’t say anything. Kindaichi considers getting up and running out of the cafe. Instead he raises his eyes just enough to see Kageyama’s face. His eyes are wide, his lips just slightly parted. He must have been halfway to his mouth with his cup of coffee, because his hand is frozen comically in mid-air. 

“Or, like, we could never speak again, if it bothers you that much,” Kindaichi blurts. His voice is getting uncomfortably loud, too loud in his own ears. “I thought—you’re friends with Bokuto, and I know his husband’s around all the time, so I didn’t figure you were like, against gay people or whatever—”

“I’m not,” Kageyama says finally. 

Kindaichi stops. “Right. Okay.”

Kageyama seems to remember how to use his limbs and sets his cup down on the table. “You think about...about holding my hand?”

Kindaichi is going to die of embarrassment. He fidgets in his seat. “Yeah. I guess.”

It might be five seconds or five minutes before either of them move again. When time finally catches up to him again, Kindaichi finds his hand is being unwrapped from the fist it had been clenched into. Kageyama slowly works his hand open, and when Kindaichi’s fingers finally cooperate, Kageyama laces them together with his.

Kindaichi’s brain short circuits. Several attempts at speech are made, all to be aborted before he completes them. Words finally spill out from his mouth.

“No calluses.”

When he looks up, he sees Kageyama is blushing almost as much as he is. “What?”

“Your—hands. They don’t have calluses.”

“I do my best to keep them lotioned.”

“Oh.”

Kindaichi looks down at where their hands are twined. Kageyama’s is warm from the coffee, and probably from the embarrassment. It feels really nice to be doing this thing he’s thought about for so long.  _ Tender _ , his brain supplies helpfully.

“What?” Kageyama says.

“Nothing.” Gods, Kunimi would be laughing his ass off if he were here right now. Kindaichi is making a fool of himself. 

Kageyama squeezes his fingers. “So...do you...want to go see a movie, or something?”

“We can do that, if you want,” Kindaichi answers. “Or we can just go to my place and play video games.”

“That sounds nice,” Kageyama says. “Do you...uh. Is it okay if we keep holding hands?”

“Yes,” Kindaichi replies, too quick. He takes a calming breath. “Yes, um. I would like that.”

“Good.” There’s a note of relief in Kageyama’s voice. “Let’s go, then.”

“Right.”

They have to maneuver to figure out how to grab their coffee cups, stand, and exit the cafe while not letting go of each other’s hands. Kindaichi thinks it’s worth it to keep seeing Kageyama’s smile. 

**Author's Note:**

> socials at joshllyman.carrd.co


End file.
